Must A Blogger Be Pastel & Rose Gold To Be Successful?: The Conclusion

Confession time: I dropped the ball. I dropped the ball in an embarrassing way, talking the talk about wanting to be a writer to take on paid writing & work with brands, then failing to write a single blog post in forever.

I was filled with such confidence about continuing my blog being my quirky, raw, individual self from the supportive loveliness I received in response to the discussion in my last post about whether or not a blogger needed to fit the pastel & rose gold cliche to be more successful than a more individual, authentic blogger.

The general consensus was that we should all 100% be ourselves & I couldn’t wait to get writing more with that in mind…

…Then I fell into an angsty, hormonal, teenage style crisis of confidence; if I’m continuing to be myself, I need to know who “myself” is. But who even am I?

Teenage Angst For Life

In so many ways I’ve always been a little bit of everything but not much of anything, starting from back in school when I was too “poppy” to be in an alternative crowd because of my love for boybands & Britpop but too “mosher” to fit in with girlie girls because of the number of piercings & tattoos I had even back then. No, your mum gave you too much childhood freedom!

And my 31 year old adult life is still in the same predicament.

I’m plus size & body positive but don’t fully fit in with the curve or bopo communities because my mission for health contradicts their anti-weight loss ethos &, similarly, I don’t fit in with “fit fams” because I’m more than happy with the aesthetics of my plentiful squishy bits.

I’m also passionate about 90s pop culture, Disney, musical theatre & comedy but because I don’t live for trends, merch or performing arts, I stick out like a sore thumb in those circles for lack of authenticity or for being somewhat of a fair-weather fan in comparison to the diehard members of those communities.

The list of too-much-but-not-quite-enough examples of my life could go on.

Somewhere I Belong

But, after presenting to you my question in my last post, it’s only fair I share with you my conclusion.

It took a whole load of self reflection (& an accidental hiatus from writing with a fair few embarrassing “fuck it, why bother with my blog anymore? Why do I have social media? What even is life?” tantrums – my bad!) but I’ve discovered that it isn’t about trying to overcome the down side of feeling like I don’t belong but owning the unique selling point that makes me unmistakably me.

Undeniably, there’s still a sense of exclusion for not having that cut & dry niche. But is that even a bad thing?

Blogging Misfits Assemble!

In the exact same vein as self love wisdom that I peddle with The 88 & Friends, we should embrace the things that make us our individual, unique, oddball selves.

We are all our own niche that nobody else can touch & – while we might not know so or have actively sought one, – by supporting each other when we’re in crisis of confidence like you lovely lot did for me, we have inadvertently forged our very own community of merry misfits!

I don’t fit in with that particular crowd of identical enthusiasts nor do I fit the bill as perfectly as others who snap up the paid writing brand collaborations that I can only dream of, but I can boast 100% authenticity that is unique only to me. And the right brands & opportunities are out there for me somewhere.

Not Fitting In Is The New Fitting In

I want to pay it forward with a quick summary of my soul searching since posing my original question in my last post; embrace our individuality & never let the success of our peers deter us from putting our all into what we are passionate about.

Hard work pays off & originality is hard to come by – keep on keeping on with both of these & we surely can’t go far wrong.

The Future Is Ours

And if, like me, your 2019 has seen wasted weeks of balancing the pros & cons of why we should even bother with this blogging lark, may this week be the most productive of the year to blast us into what will be our year in 2020.

Dani | Mrs Crater x

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(“Must A Blogger Be Pastel & Rose Gold To Be Successful?: The Conclusion” was first published by Mrs Dani Crater on “The Unseasoned Wag” blog)

28 Comments

  1. I love that blogging isn’t all pastel and rose gold to be honest. My favourite reads are from people who all have something unique to say and unique to offer 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This post speaks to me SO MUCH! I am exactly the same – I love rock/punk music but don’t look like I do at all, I like makeup and fashion but not too much that it is something identifiable with me etc… a little bit of everything is how I’d describe me too. It’s been so hard to find my audience or my niche thing because I enjoy a bit of everything but I think that’s what makes you so great – you are so approachable and just enjoy life, so many things in life, which is wonderful as a reader/audience to see 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’ve never really fit in with a crowd either, much like you I liked some heavier music and had piercings and tattoos so wasn’t girlie. But at the same time liked some pop music so wasn’t alternative enough for that crowd. I’ve grown to love my mixture of personality and likes though x

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I totally get where you are coming from and I think there are so many people out there who’s hobbies, interest, styles and tastes are so broad and diverse we don’t fit into basic boxes. This stumped me so much in my teens and early twenties because I hadn’t got a clear idea of what I was or what I wanted to do for long term hobbies or career wise or even the style I wanted to dress in each day. My personality was too diverse, even for me! Then I met The Bloke and his mates, who all just did whatever the eff they felt like at that moment. They were all middle aged and had gone through all kinds of stages and become an interesting amalgamation of them all. I thought, well isn’t that awesome. They are being them! I am me. And you are you so reflect that in everything you do Xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So much love for you & your comment – thank you so much for your reply! It’s a shame that there is a heavy vibe in blogging & influencer communities alike that only certain niches, aesthetics, lifestyles bag the bigger opportunities & they all, conveniently enough, are the same. But I now believe there is a wider world out there for broader authenticity, more diverse identities & overall oddball niches. And the overwhelming happiness of knowing we can live our best life *while* being who we truly are wins all! There’s still a place for us misfits in the blogging world & what a lovely place it is for us. x

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Aw, thanks Dani and yes, I totally agree with your wonderful points. Look at all the geek and alternative bloggers out there who cover a bit of everything. They are getting offering cool experiences and unique gifts as well as fashion and beauty by brands.

        Liked by 1 person

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