When you’re an obese 30 year old with bad teeth, arm overhang & disproportionately small boobs that have already past their perky sell by date, it would be easy to live under the “…but that female wrestler he gets on with really well has a far better body than me” cloud with the constant fear that your husband will run away with her & have perfect gym babies born into a wrestling dynasty & live happily ever after without you.
But I don’t. And it’s not because I don’t have it in me to fret over these things because, trust me, I’m one of life’s worst worriers! I simply don’t compare my wobbly self to these goddesses of the ring thanks to self love.
Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy
Although my Crater does work alongside some gorgeous women with killer bodies & is friends with some truly beautiful women, I don’t fear that he’s going to leave me for any of them because they’re “better” than me; they’re not better than me nor am I better than them, we’re just all different in our physical appearance. (That, & that I trust him!).
Self love is such a wonderful discipline – I call it a “discipline” because it is something that takes time & practice & is often easier said than done. But, as self love is the current bangwagon for trendies & sufferers alike, there’s a whole world self love self help out there that we all could & should grab with both hands for our own good!
It’s taken me literally my entire life to adopt this self love attitude & truly practice what I’ve always preached to others; I spent years faking it til I made it, pretending to be this bold boss babe in a buxom body but up until my wedding day – when I finally confirmed to my own self that I can still look & feel beautiful in my flaws – I had hated the way I look. Despite how much he loved me & my imperfections, I didn’t.
Potato Is A Shape Too!
Since that one day, my life has been transformed. I’d changed my Miss to Mrs, I’d changed my self hate to self love & I’d changed from hiding my flaws to celebrating my features. And it shows not only in how I feel but even how I look – by owning my curves instead of hiding them under shapeless sacks, I suddenly have a shape that isn’t entirely that of a potato!
But if I was 100% potato shaped (as opposed to my current 98% state of potato), would it bother me? Fuck no! Because I’m still me both in spite of & because of it. I’d simply own it like the self love gurus out there do.
Thirty Years Of Practice
I still am that obese thirtysomething with bad teeth, arm overhang & disproportionately small boobs that have already past their perky sell by date, but instead of comparing my squishy bits against others’ super toned or perfectly rounded bits, I accept that I don’t have flaws but characteristics & they all play a part in making me me. And for that I’m grateful.
Let’s all learn to love ourselves for who we are, one perfect imperfection at a time.
Dani | Mrs Crater x
PS – I’m working on a new self love initiative with my friend & Be Real Campaign ambassador, Kayleigh. Launching on New Year’s Day with a giveaway (ooooh!) is The ’88 & Friends. We’d love you to be our Friends & get involved now ready for 01/01/2019!